Economic Recovery For Men: 5 Ways To Make Money With Your Member

Gentlemen, for years your little head has gotten you into trouble, with very little ROI (that’s return on investment for all you geniuses).  Well, the free ride ends here.  And in this shrinking economy and lousy job market, it’s a perfect time to put your penis to work. Here are 5 ways to make big numbers with your digit:

1. Model your Schwanz – Rodin’s The Thinker is hung like a chipmunk compared to you, dear sir.  Put your uncut, ten-inch cock in front of those art school pukes over at Pratt and watch the cash roll in.

2. Make Art - Sell it on the black market!  Not the Black market, cause sistas ain’t got no use for your shortass dick.  But if your johnson is generous, make a mold of it and sell it outside the Met next to the dudes hawking hotdogs & African masks.  Tourists will pay top dollar, especially if you say it’s “art.”

3. Become a Male Escort – Upload a few photos of your longfellow to the Casual Encounters section of Craigslist.  Wait 24 hours.  Watch as the twinks, skanks and trannies compete for your affections.

4. Use it for Scientific Research  – Your wang is a thing of beauty that brings joy to the world.  Why not give doctors the chance to finally quantify from a scientific perspective how amazing your tool is, while contributing to the canon of male sex research?

5. Become the next Chat Roulette star – Have special dick tricks?  Can you blow yourself?  Increase your chances of becoming a celebrity and getting rich quick by letting it all hang out on this creepy webcam site.