Week In Instagram: Photo Filter Rise

Hi!

This week was long and rainy.

And long.

And I did nothing but complain about how long and rainy it was. This week I chose photo filter Rise which is like a weird, inconsistent filter that sucks the detail out of some photos and makes the rest of them look like you were snapping your photos exclusively in a hospital waiting room.

This photo turned my beautiful cat into a possum (o’possum?) I don’t know, which do you prefer?

Zero preference? I know, stupid name for an animal, eh?

My possum child did not kill this bird. He’s been laying on the sidewalk at Kipling and Belifield for at least three days now. I couldn’t get a picture because I was late on Monday. Then I couldn’t get a pic because I was also late on Tuesday because the Toronto Transit Commission is trying to ruin my life. Also, it was raining really hard on Tuesday and I’m not an idiot that would stand around instagramming photos of dead birds during a fucking storm.

That’s a lie, I would’ve done that if I weren’t running late. Anyway it rained hard that day so if any wildlife wants to eat this thing it’s likely sterilized.

These are my trusty Keds or as my friend Jenn calls them “mental patient’s day shoes“. I basically went shoeless for half a day at the office because of the rain on Tuesday morning. Eventually got fed up walking around in socks all day and sat with wet shoes the other half of the day.

What I’m saying is: I’m a survivor.

I sat down at my desk and realized a ladybug was clinging to my neck so I threw him down and immortalized him (rightfully so).

Yes I ate that almond.

Anyway, he was still for a solid hour but eventually started walking around so, I liberated him (threw him onto his back outside) then felt bad, walked back outside and spent a good two minutes trying to flip him onto his feet because I’d like some of that sweet, sweet karma.

This is a new advertisement for I don’t know what. Christians? I don’t fucking know. The clever person behind this ad decided to place people in front of the names of several Toronto subway stations so they could spell out “CHRIST IS OUR KING” which is adorable.

These people should be arrested.

I just flat out hated this guy’s outfit.

These are vom bus seats.

On Monday during my hell commute I got to my final intersection and had to wait an extra 15 minutes because every bus that passed was full and when one did arrive the only two seats left were covered in vom.

How did I know it was vom and not urine? You can tell by the seat in the front that the person had noodles or porridge. The second seat is just vom run off.

And yeah I know what you’re thinking “Julia, you’re like the Dexter of vom analysis!”

And yes. Vom Analyst is exactly what my business card says.

Lastly, I posted this photo on twitter and made exactly one enemy from Scotland (see angry tweets under the human turtle pic)

 

…………………Ta!

 

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