There is something powerful in the way someone looks at you. It can say such a range of things, from “you’re a swell individual” to “if you’d don’t stop staring at me, I’m gonna call the cops.”  We all get looks from friends/strangers/DMV workers, and it’s great fun to try and interpret and organize them. Below is an excerpt from my list so far. What were some of YOUR looks? Drop em in the comments.

1. “I’ve seen you naked” look.

2. “I’m not impressed at what I’m looking at while you stand in front of me naked”
look.

3. “I’m pretending I don’t remember you vomiting at that party the other night” look.

4. “I know you just pooped” look.

5. “You’re the whore who had sex with my friend on the stairs” look.

6. “I bet you have no standards” look.

7. “I just saw you order seven quesadillas from Taco Bell” look.

8. I just saw you order seven quesadillas from Taco Bell and pay with change” look.

9. “I’m sexually repulsed by the thought of you” look.

10. “You’re hot” look. (Side note: This is only from Mexican construction workers.)

11. “You don’t know how to read, do you?” look.

12. “I bet you like fat guys” look.

13. “I just saw you vomit outside of a taxicab” look.

14. “You vomit a lot” look.

15. “I’m pretty sure there is a hell and I’m pretty sure you’re going” look.

16. “You’re antics are a drain on society” look.

17. “You going to Catholic school explains a lot” look.

18. “You think Candy land is a real country, don’t you?” look

19. “I just watched you pop a zit in public” look.

20. “I’m still watching you pop a zit in public” look.

21. “Did you just tell that man to put 5 scoops of mayo on your sandwich?” look.

22. “Are you still talking?” look.

23. “You just said Danny Glover was your original fuck” look.

24. “You’re just pretending to understand science, aren’t you” look.

25. “You just ate something that fell on the ground” look.

26. “Why are you buying a 20-pack of condoms, toothpaste and a hot-pocket all at
the same time?” look.